Unstuck Club - a group for men starting this Wednesday 18 June. Check out our events page for more.
We’ve all been there — the heavy weight of avoidance, the oppressive voice of self-doubt, the task that lingers untouched month after month. At Unstuck Club, we meet people right in the middle of that experience, with compassion, curiosity, and a shared understanding that being stuck is a deeply human experience.
Think of it as a kind of adult homework club — but one with heart. We’re not just ticking off to-do lists. We’re gently illuminating the emotional undercurrents that keep us frozen in place, especially two powerful ones: shame and fear.
This isn’t about fixing people. It’s about walking alongside them as they take brave steps toward the life they want — and doing so in a community that is open-minded, open-hearted and believes in small steps and big hope.
The Values That Shape Us
At the core of Unstuck Club are three values that shape everything we do — both for participants and facilitators.
Non-Shaming
Everyone who comes to Unstuck Club knows what it feels like to be stuck. We may be stuck in different ways — a difficult conversation, a pile of paperwork, or where to begin — but we all know the feeling. That’s why we actively resist shame.
We speak with care, avoid language that mocks or pressures, and remind ourselves that shame doesn’t motivate — it demoralises. Instead, we celebrate every small step, no matter how tiny it may seem. Because every move forward matters.
Personal Agency
Change doesn’t happen because someone tells us what to do. It happens when we feel empowered to make decisions that are right for us. That’s why we don’t fix or steer. We provide the space, reflect on strengths, and stay curious.
As facilitators, we trust people to know what’s best for them — even when it’s hard. We take a “not-knowing-it-all” stance, allowing insight and clarity around the process of change to emerge without pressure.
Community
We don’t do this alone. Unstuck Club is a space where mutual support thrives. Sharing stories, cheering one another on, laughing at the messiness of it all — these moments build bonds.
We model reciprocity, remind one another that we’re all in this together, and invite connection at every turn. Growth doesn’t happen in isolation — it happens in the supportive company of others.
Why We Get Stuck: Shame & Fear
Shame and fear are two of the most powerful emotional forces behind “stuckness”. They’re both incredibly human, and they often show up together.
Understanding Shame
Shame tells us “I am bad” — not just that we’ve done something wrong, but that we are wrong. It pushes us to hide, to avoid, to ruminate. It’s often unjustified, rooted not in our actions but in harsh inner narratives.
But shame loses power when we gently face it, speak it aloud, and act in ways that challenge it. That might look like naming a task we’ve been avoiding or sharing something we’re afraid to admit.
Facilitators support this by modelling openness, offering compassion, and encouraging participants to approach rather than withdraw.
Understanding Fear
Fear (and its close cousin, anxiety) is an activating emotion — but not always in a helpful way. It tells us we’re under threat, even when we’re not. It hijacks our ability to think clearly and convinces us that we’re not safe.
In Unstuck Club, we gently explore which fears are real and which are stories. We support each other to face feared tasks and build confidence through action. This might mean approaching a difficult email, a scary conversation, or simply showing up.
We teach tools to ground ourselves — body posture, breathing, self-talk — and remind each other: you can do things which feel hard.
A Thoughtful Process
We support participants through two courageous steps:
Naming the task they’ve been avoiding.
Taking action on that task — or a smaller piece of it.
Sometimes people want to skip step one. It’s uncomfortable, after all. But naming what we’re avoiding is where transformation begins. To support this, we use a helpful “emotional temperature check”:
How long have I been putting this off?
How emotionally ‘hot’ does this task feel? (1 = not bothered, 10 = highly charged)
The sweet spot? Somewhere between a 3 and a 6. Not too cold, not too overwhelming — just challenging enough to get us moving forward.
Facilitating With Care
Facilitators at Unstuck Club carry a unique responsibility. We’re not taskmasters. We’re stewards of emotional safety and compassionate accountability.
That means:
We notice when shame or fear might be holding someone back — and we don’t rush to “fix.”
We keep our tone hopeful and helpful, (without any Mr. Motivator hyper-positivity or patronising sickly sweetness!)
We remind people why they’re here and what freedom might lie beyond the ‘stuckness’.
We stay attuned to our own emotional reactions and seek support when needed.
We also stay prepared — especially around fear — by brushing up on grounding skills and knowing how to respond if someone feels overwhelmed. The tasks might seem small, but they can stir big feelings. Our emotions make us human, and we deal with them in a human way.
Who It's For (and Not For)
Unstuck Club is for people who are ready to lean into discomfort, face avoidance gently, and move forward with support.
It’s not always the right space for people experiencing intense, deep-rooted fear or shame that hasn’t been explored in a therapeutic context. That’s okay. Knowing where we are in our journey is powerful. And when someone is ready — we’ll be here. We can also signpost to counsellors we work with if that is a better fit for you right now.
Final Thoughts
Unstuck Club is about more than productivity. It’s about freedom. The freedom to step out from under the weight of self-criticism, to take back agency, and to move — even just a little — in the direction of what matters.
And we do it together.
If you’re curious about how to get started, get in touch! It all begins with presence, patience, and permission to be exactly where you are — no shame, just steps forward with a supportive bunch of blokes going through similar things.