Positive and Challenging people

By Ben Harper

Let’s be honest. Being with some people energises me. Being with some other people drains my batteries! That’s ok. 

Some people ‘get us’, we ‘get them’. They inspire us, encourage us, make us laugh, and are then when we cry, and we do the same for them. These people are a joy to be with. We need these people.

We also need those that aggravate us, wind up us up the wrong way, see the world differently from us. This stretches us, causes us to see beyond our limited worldview and make us more rounded and compassionate people. 

But we do need less of these people. Spending too much time hanging out with people who ‘get on our nerves’ will drive us to total distraction, and that’s not good for our wellbeing!

• Spend some time considering who your positive people are. Jot their names down, and spend a moment being grateful for them, and what they bring to your life. 

• Spend some time considering those that are more challenging to be around. Jot their names down, and spend a moment being grateful for them, and what they bring to your life.

It will be draining for you to spend too much time around the people who are challenging. That’s ok. We don’t need to best friends with everyone, but we should choose to be nice, polite and grateful for what people like this bring to our lives. 

Now consider …

How you might manage you time to ensure your level of battery charge remains at an acceptable level to you. Schedule in time with positive people after spending time with those who are more challenging, minimise time with those that are more challenging or reminding yourself of the benefits the challenging people bring. 

It’s ok to feel drained. It’s ok to find space to recharge.