Adapting for Resilience

We’ve all probably met and know people who we think are resilient.

These people have the ability to keep going, to overcome hardship or to stay positive or hopeful when others aren’t. It’s a wonderful ability to have.

Sometimes though, we find it harder to look at ourselves that way. Maybe we see more faults or don’t find it as easy to be kind to ourselves. When it comes to resilience, maybe we worry we aren’t strong enough or don’t have the ability to react. But I wonder if the truth is a little different?

The fact is you’ve got this far and getting through a pandemic is no mean feat. So how have you done it? What has enabled you to get through a year of a crisis? To get through three lockdowns and all they’ve brought?

Dictionary definitions of the word resilience give us a clue. They talk about toughness but also the ability to adapt and change. The NHS definition puts it like this:

“Resilience is a key factor in protecting and promoting good mental health and is defined as an individual’s ability to successfully adapt to life tasks in the face of social disadvantage or highly adverse conditions.”

This definition is worth thinking about in three ways. Notice:

  • resilience is not about avoiding hardship but responding to it, when it happens.

  • resilience is born of tough circumstances and it’s therefore not a weakness to struggle

  • resilience is about adapting to tough times, not hardening up or being strong

I find these ideas incredibly helpful.

I often worry that sometimes wrong with me when tough times come. The truth is though that tough times come to all of us.

I often think that my struggles or weaknesses hold me back, but actually they are the doorway to being resilient.

I often feel like I need to be tougher or harder, but instead, resilience asks me to adapt.

Albert Einstein, one of the cleverest people to ever live, said that intelligence was all about the ability to change. The greatest qualification we can have is the life experience of adapting or changing when life hits us hard. And you can do this, because you already have.

Reflect

Look back on the last year and all you’ve gone through. You’ve made it this far. Spend a moment realising this is an achievement. If you can give yourself a well done.

Think about what has enabled you to do this. How have you adapted?

Think on any struggles you have at the moment, how can you use these experiences to adapt again?

Alongside this article are two meditations to help us think about these issues:

  • Listen to The Horizon to consider how we adapt to the future.

  • Watch the Balance Video to ponder how staying balanced when life is tough can help us adapt.

Most of all …

Remember you’ve got this far, and that’s amazing.