THE BALANCE OF GROWING 

Through this month we’ve faced a struggle. How can we share resources and encouragement for personal growth when we’re in a lockdown? Everyone is struggling right now, so how is growth something we can reasonably think about?

I could write here that everything will be ok, that the experience will change us or that in the end we will come through. The truth though, is somewhat unclear. We don’t know when lockdown will end. We don’t know what the future holds. So what can we do?

As we entered lockdown three, we have found that an emphasis on being self-aware has been important. If I can see inside myself - like an engine in a car - and work out what is working well, what is not and what needs servicing - then I have a good chance of being able to care for myself and help myself to grow.

This task isn’t easy. How do you look inside like this? Our tools for growth last week hopefully provide some help.

The task also isn’t easy because in look honestly at ourselves we sometimes have to see the bits that aren’t working well or where we are struggling. Often we are unaware of our weaknesses or struggles - they happen below the surface. But when we become aware and have to face them - this is harder and the person who can do this is being very brave.

But there is hope.

When we take time to stop and be self-aware we can begin to see two types of things within us.

Firstly, I hope we see all the positives. The things we are doing well and the positive steps you are taking in life. Take time to be cheered by this. However life feels, there will be positives. Try to find them.

But secondly, we may see things we are struggling in. Maybe we get lonely, or face depression or struggle to contain frustration or anger. What are we to do about this? The psychologist Sigmund Freud wrote “out of your vulnerabilities will come your strength.”

In these times when you become aware of your struggles - consider the balance of growth. As we work at and face the things that are hard, we grow. Even being honest and admitting something or facing an area and sharing it - even that is a step of growth. In facing ourselves honestly, and accepting where we are, we take a giant step forward.

When you consider this, think of it as a step of growth. Personally, then have been times when I struggled a great deal with anxiety. This has been hard to admit but when I did face up to the anxiety I felt, strangely I began to grow and change. I sought help, I reached out to friends. In this vulnerability I seemed to gain a strength.

Take time now to consider the engine of your life.

What areas are working well? Take time to notice them and be encouraged.

What areas need some service? Accept this and consider how you might reach out for help. Realise this is the beginning of growth.

Together we can do this.

Article by Andy Freeman, the Director and Founder of Space to Breathe.